1. |
Answer Anything
02:24
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Move my head into new space
Begin decorating walls
Organize all my thoughts by subject
Leave a chair empty in the hall
When you walk in
I can say
How've you been these days
'Tell me anything, entertain!'
Blank face in an unfamiliar place
You look like Christmas in April
Warm sweater warm drinks
Soft lighting from patient sunlight
Hits your leg as the fog rolls in
I wanna know
How we think
To avoid the escape
From reality
and the nerves
That make me tired as soon as I'm awake
So snap my fingers
Break my arms and all my bones
Help me build them back up
Into the person that I was
When I was 21
And I'll keep my pace
Splitting thoughts
To help filter through the ideas I've lost
Distracted at home
Cause I'm never alone
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2. |
Learning Curves
02:03
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She says she's good
As they are sitting side by side
But the floors in her sight his intuition was right
High five, well ok there's something that's certainly
Not good
About the way her face
Matches the white walls, ducking phone calls
Pacing quickly towards where he exits
What's your game?
What's your angle?
It's been a good week
This isn't how I thought I'd spend
A Friday night again
And now he's home
He doesn't feel that bad the next day
Woke up on the couch to friends being loud
This my life now, maybe I need to
Settle down
Re-evaluate
The way I've been thinking, clearly sinking
I don't need to be asking you questions like
What's your game?
What's your angle?
It's been a good week
This isn't how I thought I'd spend
A Friday night again
It seems odd
But it's important
To engage myself in conversations in the morning
I'm learning
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3. |
Calibrate
01:40
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It's been a long day
Visiting your household
On my birthday
Sober faces scan the room awkwardly, noticing, that I don't think you're clean
So I calibrate emotions in my brain.
I think about you
Now that I'm much older
I can doubt you
And the flame that you ignite by inviting me, shockingly, and bringing just yourself Why would I believe you here in hell?
I don't really wanna show my cards
Small talk in a neutral bar
I said it all six years ago
When you told me it was all my fault
Now I'm feeling like I'm seizing up
But in the morning I wake up
I'm miles away
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4. |
Boroughs
01:49
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Found your kit in a pile of your laundry
Wonder if you could tell our family
Im too young but I have a point here
Hold your hand over half your face
Just to see if you could focus on the road
I hope so
And then we move you away from Jamaica, Queens
White sheets and a cleaner place to sleep
And I've already learned my lesson
You haven't aged since seventeen
So I know that I should keep tradition up
And give away your things secondhand
Again, and again
Cause I don't need your negative lifestyle
I have support from my friends at home
There's no metaphor to hide my anger
But I'm ready to let this conversation go
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5. |
Standard
03:17
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Welcome back today's been a disaster
Repairing myself from a difficult morning after
Whitestone waves hello as I drive past it
I'm talking aloud and alone in a Ford Fiesta casket
Hold on to those nights in New York City
A bottle of wine and a few debates were all I had in me
Every street I yell down holds me to its standards
How come it sounds nice when no one answers?
It feels sincere
How often I can disappear
So I rely
On shutting down when I arrive
Swollen eyes
High at night
Uninspired
So it's not as bad as it seemed at 18
But the memories greet me in my worst dreams
I'll go home slow
Please don't follow
It feels sincere
How often I can disappear
So I rely
On shutting down when I arrive
Swollen eyes
High at night
Uninspired
Fade out
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6. |
Repeat
02:00
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Head spins forward half an hour
To the time I spend beside these flowers
I speak in cadence slow and weak
As you prepare to leave
Hail hits houses on my street
Knocking closer as i sleep
And to be quite honest I can't see
An end to the noise I meet
So fall
In this seat
Talk to me
In this room
That I can't
Ever complete
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7. |
Buck
02:45
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Is it cool, if I leave
Will that be alright
The pressure is visible and cold
I have a long ride at least I think so
The same old album list
On the bus, the same just feels alright
I have a good life in a new place
A queen sized bed for once
I managed to make it down on my own
The faint emotions are retreating
The mood swings and the fights
Until I click, then the same just feels alright
I don't ask you don't tell me
I don't ask I don't have to
Reading messages you choose to ignore
Leaving clothes thrown around on the floor
I don't do that
I don't do that
Up at six just to look at my phone
Spending way too much time on my own
I don't do that
I don't do that
Just hold on I can't hear while you speak
I'd rather leave and breathe a sigh of relief
I can do that
(He can do that)
I can do that
(He can do that)
You can do that
(You can do that)
You should do that
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8. |
Think Tank
01:13
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Hello, what happened to our surroundings
You can make it without me for the first time in years
And now, you have a much clearer vision
Not a single decision could've changed anything
So what do you think
Is the best way out
Is it pursuing the clear path or
Moving out of our town
So what do you think
Is the best way out
Does it feel false or
Is this just getting loud
Come on, I'm trying hard to stay patient
Finding I'm not relating well i guess I'll just go
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9. |
Every Other Day
03:11
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Every single day there is something I could say
On this screen, typing keys
But my articulation is fading away
So I wait, wide awake
Hurricane weather when it's 40 degrees
5 whole years, end up here
With my high school mentality
Until I go
Out at night
Find drugs to buy
I wanna ask
But I shouldn't lie
About friends we had
And those I try
To keep a
Hold on tightly
Scared of everything
I changed for
I'll walk out
Later on I wait around the corner and you wave
So reserved, never heard of
Sparking up conversations too late
On the train, wrong again
Ivy League education replaced
With hate
Lifetime of sheltered news on at 8
It's too late
Until I go
Slide the key
Waste drinks on me
I wanna ask
But I shouldn't lie
About friends we had
And those I try
To keep a
Hold on tightly
Scared of everything
I changed for
I'll walk out
Okay, the bar is beginning to clear
One thing, I needed this time spent here
To reconnect
With all the lies
That you tell yourselves each night
I wanna ask
But I shouldn't lie
Reunited tonight
With all these
Guys from high school
Screaming nonsense
Sick of waiting
Cold walk home
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10. |
||||
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Painting portraits in my brain
New York apartment, pouring rain
Are you still in?
Avoiding questions I should have asked
Haven't seen you since I've been back
Where have you been?
It's ok I figured you would say it like that
Short phrase, wishing me a better path
No truth, just secrets woven into
Trick words, created by a coward
Send me pictures from way upstate
This will feel like a great mistake
What do you know
This conversation made me weak
Turn my phone off, stay discrete
You don't notice
Fighting off the urge to resent you
For all the things I lost when I met you
Good friends, better off distant
Hanging on til you decide you're ready to begin
Painting pictures in my brain
New calmness I can relate to
I am all in
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